My new cleaning friend

Ok so I’ve become addicted (yes…ADDICTED) to Pintrest!  It is the most awesome website in the world!  It is a bunch of people posting anything and everything from the internet! (can you tell how excited I am from all the exclamation points?)
Anywho, I came across a picture of a lady scrubbing the carpet and I clicked on the picture, which took me to her blog where she explained that she used baking soda and some essential oils to remove the smell of her sons vomit from the carpet, even though she had cleaned it well, or so she thought.  That got me to thinking.  Hunny has made some messes in the apartment and when you lay down on the carpet you can still smell the odor of urine.  I decided to type in the search of “carpet cleaners” and there was a video explaining that sprinkling just plain baking soda and just letting it sit for a period of time if would 1) absorb any smells (I mean we put it in the fridge to absorb any smells in there) and 2) absorb any oils/grease that may be in the carpet! I decided to try it out in my bedroom since that seems to be Hunny’s favorite place to “leave me presents”.  I vacuumed first to get any loose hair and debris and then sprinkled the soda and let it sit for about an hour, then vacuumed it up.  I decided to do the smell test for myself and sure as s#!t the smell was COMPLETELY GONE!!!  I then used it all over the apartment and the carpets feel softer and cleaner since the body oils are now all gone!
This got me now intrigued with baking soda.  What else could I do with it?  I searched “baking soda cleaners” and low and behold good old Martha Stewart has a bath tub cleaner where you use just baking soda, a teaspoon of dish soap, and an antibacterial essential oil (I just used the soap since it’s soap.  I mean we wash dishes with it. It’s gotta get rid of bacteria, right?)  You add enough water to create a paste and you are good to go.  Holy cow!  This is the best scrub ever!!! 1) no chemical smells that knock you out!  Also, you don’t have to take everything out because of the cleaning chemicals getting on the loofa, razors or anything else. 2) it takes a little bit more elbow grease, but it works wonders! I have a textured floors in the shower and I could never get it completely clean.  This took care of it and my shower looks brand new.  3) It works just as well as on the fixtures in the shower as well.  Its almost like a soft scrub. I also used it on my sink in the kitchen since its stainless steel and its worked great!
Oh and 1 more great thing baking soda is great for is…DRAIN-O! Remember as a kid you would combine vinegar and baking soda and a volcano would be the result?  Well…think of that in your pipes!  I used it in my bathroom sink and the pipes run nice and clear without the harsh chemical smell or the worries of it getting on your skin.  I also used it in the kitchen to clean the drain before running the dishwasher.  No more funky smell
Well there you go.  My new love

Doctors, medicine and strange conditions

Ok so ever since 9th grade I knew I was “unique” when it came to illnesses.  Back in 9th grade I went camping out at Lake O’Neil with Girl Scouts (yes, I was still a Girl Scout in high school) and had a great time.  But a few days later I developed a strange rash on my body and arms.  Mom thought I was having a reaction to a new laundry detergent.  We rewashed all of my clothes and bedding in the old stuff, but it didn’t clear up.  Actually it got worse.  Long story short I saw 9 doctors in 3 days and they had no idea what was wrong with me.  They referred me to a dermatologist and come to find out I got some strange virus which we now call in my family Veronicaticulitis.  I missed 3 weeks of my freshman year and I still have scars from the crazy boils I got on my arms when it was “clearing” up.

Then in 2002 I had a super sharp pain right under my diaphragm.  This all happened right as I was about to move out to Colorado for school and after some blood work they told me my liver enzymes were sky high!  I underwent a butt load of tests (x-rays, ultrasounds, cat scans, and a menagerie of blood tests, including tests for rare hepatitis, mono and other weird liver conditions) and everything came back normal.  I was told it was probably fatty liver (since I was fat) and that I needed to eat boiled chicken and rice for a month and come back in for more tests.  Real scientific.  But I did it and the levels dropped a little, but nothing to get excited over.  We just accepted that my high liver enzymes were normally high.

Jump forward to 2008.  I just got back from Israel and my stomach was freaking out!  I was using the restroom 5-10 minutes after eating anything and god help me if I ate anything greasy!  I thought I had developed some weird food issue and I started cutting out and adding things into my diet, doing food trials.  I knew that after I had Caleb I had become a tad bit lactose intolerant, and I figured this was all due to stress since my old roommate bailed on me right before I went to Israel.  After much begging from mom, I went to the doctors.  I told him what was going on, and asked for a round of antibiotics, hoping that I just picked up for sort of bacteria on my travels.  Well that didn’t do anything and he then told me I needed to see a gastroenterologist (digestive doc).  I went and saw Dr. Kumar and he told me I needed to have a colonoscopy.  I went home and cried!  I was too young to have that done!  But after my procedure he came and told me I have ulcerative colitis (small ulcers all along my intestinal tract). Of course this is actually rare in women in my age range…OF COURSE! That is when all of the medicine came into play. Pills, pills, PILLS! I was taking up to 20 pills a day.  Luckily they changed my meds and now I am taking my intestinal meds once a day.

Next thing on the list was my liver issues.  Dr. Kumar ordered a liver biopsy to get down to the root of my levels and to why they were so high.  We got the results and he gave me a call.  “Hi Veronica, this is Dr. Kumar.  We have the results of your liver biopsy and it appears that you have Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, which is rare in women and even more so in your age group.”  OF COURSE IT IS!!!!!  Basically I have sludge that has built up in my bile duct and my liver is unable to get rid of the waste the correct way, so my levels are high because of it.  I scheduled an appointment with him to discuss this new issue and he informed me that because of my UC (ulcerative colitis) and the PSC my chances of getting colon cancer are very high. FAN-FIRCKIN-TASTIC!!!!  He told me that I have to have a colonoscopy every 2 years for the next 8 years (until I’m 40), then yearly.  Then he prescribed me more medication to help with the clearing of the bile duct.

Then a few months ago, life was pretty normal for me, then I noticed my shin was super sore.  It felt like someone kicked me with a steel toe boot!  It never developed into a bruise, just a huge bump and then it started getting red and super inflamed. I went to urgent care twice for it and the 2nd time the doctor looked at it and said I know exactly what that is (thank goodness I thought because the 1st doctor had no idea).  He walked out of the room and brought in another doctor to look at my leg and they said “You have a rare condition (there’s that stupid word again…rare) called Erythema Nodosum.  It is a rare condition that people with UC get in their shins and forearms where the fatty cells become super inflamed.”  They then referred me to a Rheumatologist who told me that this would be something that “typically” only happens once with UC patients but I can also develop Ocularitis (swelling of the eyeball) and Rheumatory Arthritis (I know I will more than like have that when I get older since my grandma had it and I am already showing factors for it).  He then prescribed me moooooore medicine (steroids).

It seems like my life is revolving around a medicine time table:

Breakfast: Vitamin and steroid

Mid-Morning Snack: liver meds

Dinner: steroid

1 hour later: liver meds

Then at least another hour later: intestinal meds

God help me if I miss any of them because if I do…it throws off my entire day, haha.

 

7 years ago…

I found myself in Tri City Hospital starting the process of bringing a beautiful life into the world.  I had no idea if I would be a mother to a son or a daughter, but either way I wanted the best for them.  I wanted them to have a mom and a dad who were going to be there for them and provide the type of home I grew up in.  I knew that his father would not be in the picture.

After only a few hours of labor and no real “pushing” (thank goodness) into the world came Caleb!  I never thought such joy actually existed!  After everything we had been thru, and it was a lot, here he was…MY SON!  Hearing him cry and having them tell me he was perfectly fine I was so relieved.  I wasn’t the best mom as I had no prenatal care and was sick for the majority of the pregnancy so to hear that he was healthy and had all fingers and toes, those were the best words I could of ever heard\!

I knew that I was going to give him up for adoption once his father and I had a conversation about 9 months prior, but I had no idea that God would of provided such a fantastic Foster family and a “Forever” family for my little boy. Most birth moms do not meet the foster families, but he had some medical issues and I needed to contact them.  Frank and Susan are some of the most caring people who make everyone feel welcome.

 

And picking Caleb’s “Forever” family was the easiest thing I ever had to do.  Their profile was the one my social worker showed me first, and I fell in love with them instantly!  They were high school sweethearts and both teachers (my parents knew each other in high school), had a biological daughter (I’m the oldest as is she), they live on a cul-de-sac (I grew up on one), involved in church and girl scouts, and them the kicker…they had a golden retriever named Maggie (we had a golden named Maggie growing up as well).  I knew that these were the people I wanted my son to go to, but I wanted to give other people a chance and I took a look at other profiles, but in the back of my mind they were the people I wanted.

The past 7 years have been a roller coaster of emotions, but seeing his face smiling and now calling me “birth mom” makes it perfect!  Knowing that in the next few years we will be having the “conversation” about why things happened honestly scare me, but I know that I have a fantastic support system with my family as well as my extended family!

Thank you mom, dad for your support and being there when I needed a shoulder to lean and cry on. Frank and Susan for taking care of my son while I found a family for him, and Cindy and Scott…I cannot say thank you enough!  I love you all!

I love you

Almost a year ago I met a fantastic man named Hazen Whitaker.  We met on PlentyofFish.com (an online dating website).  I was skeptical when I first started looking on there at the guys.  They all seemed like losers.  But then 1 day I stumbled upon a profile of a guy named Hazen.  He recently was stationed here to Camp Pendleton and was looking for someone to hang out with.  He wanted to learn to surf, enjoyed the beach, had a Harley, and  seemed like a great guy online.  So I thought I would shoot him a message letting him know I’m a local and if he wanted to hang out just let me know.

A few weeks later after talking and texting we decided to meet up at the O’side pier and head down to the Carlsbad Street fair.  I was very happy when I first saw him.  Tall, tattoos and although a Marine, he looked like a local (not the typical marine haircut). 

We decided to head down to the fair and once we got there, we just clicked.  He was very protective of me around all of the people and making sure that I was doing ok.  Needless to say after 9 hours together of exploring Carlsbad and the coast (we also decided to go to Swamis and then headed back up to Ruby’s for dinner) I thought that would be it.  When he walked me to my car he asked if he could see me the following weekend.  The following weekend was another of 8 and 9 hour days together.  We walked on the beach, talked, sang at the top of our lungs while driving, and had no cares in the world.

We spent 6 months together and honestly they were 6 wonderful months! And this was the first time ever I had been in a relationship that I had never told that person that I loved them or had that person tell me they loved me.  I wanted to many times towards the end, but I figured I’d let him tell me first (nope I’m not stubborn, I was just scared).

He decided to go back home (Colorado) for a month and go deer hunting with his dad.  It was probably the longest month since he didn’t have service up where he was hunting so I would only hear from him occasionally when he would get back to his truck and go back into town.

Finally came the day before he was getting ready to leave!  I was so excited!  I got a text from him saying “Hey baby. I’m headed to bed cause I’m coming home to you tomorrow.  I love you and can’t wait to see you!” I replied saying “Let me know when you get home, can’t wait to see you either!”  I decided I wanted to tell him in person that I loved him, but that was the last I heard from him.  I thought maybe his phone died when he got home and I know he said they had to go out to the field when he got back so I thought he was out there, but after a month and a half I started getting worried. 

I came into work one day and about 15 minutes into my day I told my friend that I was going to take the flip flops he left here (for when he rode his motorcycle out here) and his watch back out to where he worked on base.  About 10 minutes later she called me into her office and said “Is his him?” On her screen I saw a picture of Hazen and his obituary. I was in total shock!  Not him!  Anyone but him! Reading it, it said that it appeared he fell asleep at the wheel early Saturday morning, September 25th, went off the road and rolled the car.  He died on impact.  I never told him I loved him.  Why didn’t I tell him?  Why?  Why was I so stubborn?

Now I have dreams about him.  The first one was I was at a friends house and I heard a noise coming from the bedroom.  I asked what that was and my friend looked at me and said “It’s Hazen.”  I went running in there and there he was sitting on the bed with cuts and scrapes but a smile on his face.  He looked at me and I ran to him.  The dream was so real that even the tattoo on his wrist was perfect.

The second dream was last night.  I was in a mountain town and there he was walking on the side of the road.  We made eye contact and he yelled for the truck to stop.  He ran over to me flung the door opened and grabbed me and hugged me!  He told me he had been looking for me.

Why am I having these dreams?  Why must my heart and mind do this to me?  I feel so guilty for not telling him I loved him.  I love you Hazen and I am so sorry I never told you!

Rest in Peace my love

.

Week of Jan 9-16, 2011

So this week I “officially” started training for the 10k.  Needless to say…HOLY CRAP I WAS SORE!  I found a couch to 5k training guide and I changed it up for my personal training.  It had me walking 2 minutes and running 1.5 minutes.  I changed it to me running 2-4 minutes depending on how I was feeling and walking 1-2 minutes.  I felt good after going for 30 minutes and I was only short 1/2 mile to of finished a 5k.  I can totally do this!!!!

And yesterday was the first time since July I scrapbooked all day and worked on pages for my scrapbook.  If I went to a crop I was always working on something else for someone else.  It was nice to spend time with mom and my “other mother” Lori Jo laughing and being goofs.

  

I also got to see friends from the Survivor Crop Committee who I have seen since October!  I woke up late yesterday and realized that I had nothing to work on at the crop so I printed up pictures of when I went into the studio with the Mikey Show!  I alos printed up pictures of last Sunday when Liz, Marion and Brady went to the grand opening of Sprinkles cupcakes in La Jolla (don’t lie, I know you’re jealous).  It was cold, but the time I spent with them was fantastic!

When I went to the crop I seriously thought I would run out of things to do, but after 7 hours I only finished 2 pages :)

Not too bad I think for only getting the pics and finding an idea in about 20 minutes :)

After I finished that page, I started on the Mikey Show page.  I had to leave to go to church and serve so unfortunaetly I didn’t have 7 hours to work on that page, but after cutting out the pictures and picking out the paper (oh yeah, all the paper in the layouts I bought at Ever After Scrapbooks because I didn’t have enough time to sort through all my paper here and figure out what papers looked good with the pictures.  Can you say procrastinator?)  But I got it all laid out and I took a picture so I know what I wanted to do with it once I got back around to scrapping.

Oh!!! And I also got a REALLY cute Circut cartridge that I have been wanting for the longest time, Create-A-Critter!

How adorable are they!!!!  The dog totally reminds me of Hunny :)

Am I crazy?!?!

 

Ok so earlier this week I was sitting in my office at work and looking on Facebook on my phone (yep...I like to call it multi tasking) and I saw that my cousin Megan had posted something for a half marathon up in Disneyland.

Now for the past few months Scott, my cousin Megan's husband, has been training to run with Bill and Holly in a 1/2 marathon at the Wild Animal Park (I refuse to call it the San Diego Safari Park as it is now named, just like the Q will always be Jack Murphy Stadium and the Del Mar Fair will always be that, not the San Diego County Fair. I will conform to something's, but not all, haha) and Bill and Holly have been trying to talk me into running with them. Now I do not run..AT ALL!!! But as I saw the post for Disneyland, it got me thinking, that run takes place in September and I can do that. But then it hit me, that's 13.1 miles. Too much! Then I remember seeing a run take place in Del mar one year when I was training for the 3 Day called Iron Girl Del Mar . I looked it up and its a 5 and 10K and takes place in November. 3 and 6 miles...now I can do that! So I signed up O_o

Reality has set in. By November I will be running 6 miles! For a girl who hates to run will be completing this with Holly by my side (and hopefully Megan too!). Its been 4 years since I have done something that has required some sort of training. And this is also a year a faith so I have faith that God will provide me with the motivation and energy to train and get my butt in gear :)

So here goes, starting Monday I am running for 30 minutes on a treadmill (in intervals of course) and will start working my way up to the 6 miles!

Wish me luck!

Shawn McDonald: Here I Am

Let's try this again...

Ok, so I just saw that my last blog was actually 1 year ago and I wrote that I was going to be on here more and more, but actually that ended up being my last blog, haha. Lets try this again :)

This year I have no resolutions and I have not set any sort of expectations at all this year. It seems like when I set them I get disappointed of the things that didn't happen. My verse for this year is Romans 12:2 "Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is."
This was in a book I got a few years ago called "Jesus Calling" and it is a daily devotional and this was the verse in there for today. I found it profound for me this year. I went into 2010 with the hopes and expectations of finally getting married and joining that "group" of friends who were off the market and happily married. I was let down around May when I knew that would not happen with the guy I was dating at the time. This morning I realized this is only the second year I have started off as single. The last year was back when I was working up in Temecula. Every other year I have started it in a relationship thinking that that would be the year I would get "the ring" and have always been let down.
This year I am starting it knowing that God is going to start working on me and our relationship and I need to know that is all I need this year! Knowing this, I have faith that He will give me what my heart truly desires at the perfect time.